An Ordinary Woman; Prov 22:6

Being the mother of two men and the grandparent of one little boy and one beautiful little girl is somewhat overwhelming to me some 23 years later. I never imagined I would be a "grand" at such a young age. But now that God has placed me in this role it has taught me more about myself than I ever could have imagined.
I've realized that parenting for many is a learned skilled, it didn't just come natural for me like it did for so many of my other friends in the same role. I had to learn how to discipline and how to manage my time and theirs while maintaining who I am. I had to learn how to be patient while encouraging them in their gifts; which are many. I had to pray hard, read a few motivational books, search through parenting magazines and study the Bible for direction and new ways to be the best mommy I could possibly be.
No one likes to admit these things; that parenting doesn't come natural for everyone. But I will. I believe that if we weren't ashamed to admit it, then many of us moms wouldn't find ourselves suffering from issues like depression, postpartum and anger that we suppress deep inside because of the stigma society places on us. I've made many mistakes and sometimes wish I could start at the beginning. But, I can not. So, I must look in the mirror and say to myself, "Sheila, you did the best that you knew how to do", and trust that God will continue to do a complete work in my sons.
As I look back, I can honestly say I enjoyed being a mother. I enjoyed carrying my boys for nine months in my womb. I enjoy watching them develop into the great men they are becoming. And now my men (well one of them) has a little man and little lady of his own. My second chance, as I see it, to embrace my son and encourage him and teach him how to be the best father that he can possibly be. I'm no different than many, I'm just an ordinary woman who had to learn to be the best mother (and now grandmother) that I can possibly be.

"Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it."

Stronger, Wiser... I Followed my HEART

Recently I decided to move to Florida. I didn't have a reasonable reason, nor did I feel I needed one. I simply wanted to move away and so I did. I followed MY heart.

People didn't understand my decision and that's justifiable because I admit I didn't understand it myself.  I just knew that I had to go. I had to leave Texas. It wasn't about a man or a mouse; but about me.  I'd always wanted to move away and see what was "out there". If there was something better, greater, more appealing than what I'd grown used to for the 43 years I've been on this earth. But then again, I honestly just needed to get away.  :)

And so I ventured out with my heart in my hands... God leading...  while I consulted with my GPS for directions. It's been a 3 month journey that has been very interesting and full of discovering just who Sheila is.  I used my blog to post things that were on my mind and in my heart... I journaled more... read more... understood more.  I began to consult with God more than I ever have in my life... I began to listen to the beat of my heart more closely... I could hear my thoughts... my cries... feel myself inhale and exhale... sometimes... almost... audibly.  I began to see my life clearer than ever. I came to peace with who I am and discovered that I march to the beat of my own drums.

I can honestly say that it has been great...I met so so many people... honed my craft as a stylist, gained new energy for my career and realized that I am actually great at what I do! I fell deeper in love with Christ... leaning and depending on Him for every move I made, calling on Him when it would become so achingly lonely... and laughing when He would renew my strength after I thought I couldn't make it another day. I re-discovered the ministry that God placed in me when I was in the 8th grade... I've got to get busy and be about His business! I also discovered that every state I visited brought a new culture of people... a change in the climate... a new discovery. And with each new personal introduction I discovered a little bit more about me... I'm not so bad after all!

I also realized who is really a friend, foe, enemy, family, loved one etc... I discovered who really and truly cares about me.  It's an odd sort of people who makes the phrase "out of sight, out of mind" popular.  That statement is disheartengly true. People will forget you as soon as you move out of their comfort zone. Why do we expect others to crawl into our box and not get out? People aren't comfortable when you step out in faith and do what they are afraid to do. It's the crab mentality... that's why YOU have to follow YOUR own heart!

I've visited 5 states (maybe 6, I need to check) and numerous cities in just 3 months. In one day alone I enjoyed breakfast in Florida, lunch in downtown Atlanta and dinner in the lovely state of Alabama! I googled upon a church ministry that impacted me more than I ever expected... worked in salons that opened my eyes to some new ideas and concepts... met clients who encouraged my skills. Everyday was full of renewed purpose.  I would have NEVER experienced days like that if I hadn't followed my heart. The person God created in YOU is too big to be chained to the demands of others!

So, here I am... traveling state by state back to my home of TX.... and I'm not dismayed nor am I discouraged... I'm ENCOURAGED. I'm sure their are those waiting in the shadows to say, "I told you so", but really what they will be saying to me is that they didn't have it in them to do what I did. And that's ok. I'm stronger because of the journey and wiser because I did it... ALONE... against all odds. I made it through! What started out as a moved evolved into a mission. God will always get His way! FOLLOW YOUR HEART to where ever God is leading you... don't allow others to hold you back. Do whatever it is to get the breakthrough you need and I promise you... you'll never feel the same again. You'll be glad you did... I am.
“veni, vidi, vici.”
Live a P.O.S.H Life!
Sheila

"Your sons and daughters will prophesy.."

"'In the last days, God says, I will pour out my Spirit on all people. Your sons and daughters will prophesy, your young men will see visions, your old men will dream dreams."

I wanted to share with you two people that I think are a force for the devil to reckon with. I enjoy listening to powerful women and men preach the gospel and this young lady, Evangelist

Bridgette Wright blesses me every time I can find something on her to listen to or watch. She is anointed truly and so very humble. It is a double blessing when they are young and dedicated to see their visions and dreams come to past regardless of what this world says! Gods Word is still the only map for our lives and we can live holy if we so choose. I hope and pray that you enjoy. And if so, google her for more videos etc and/or visit Evangelist Bridgette Wright on Facebook. 

And Courtney Meadows... Omg, is all I can say. Blessed my lil socks off when he preached about a month ago at Majestic Life Ministries in Orlando. I was in awe when he said he was only 19 years old! Enjoy and visit Courtney Meadows when you get a chance.  And if you ever have an opportunity to hear either of them in person, make yourself available. You will not be disappointed.

Live a P.O.S.H Life!
Sheila

Great is thy faithfulness...

When making life changing decisions and praying fervently about which direction you should take; many times it's hard to know what God wants you to do. I know we believe that Gods word is the ultimate map in our lives and all that we ever need can be found in the Word of God. And it is. However, sometimes our good isn't always God. And it's in those times when things seem to get what I consider "a little tricky".

I'm making HUGE life altering decisions in my life. And yes, I'm praying constantly about which route to take. And in all that I'm doing, I feel that God is with me even though I know the world may think I'm losing my mind! :) I'm at peace spiritually although the situation is chaotic. I'm ok with the trials and the tribulations that have come with my choices. But sometimes I ask myself, "are you sure you are on the right path?"

So what do you do when the choices you are making seem to always work out fine? When the decision you chose happened to be a "good" one? When all that you are doing isn't harming anyone and doors seem to open where they should be closed and you seem to excel? When provisions are being made where you know they're shouldn't be any? When those you are encountering are being blessed by a word or a deed that you've done?

You may say, well if its all going great then surely it must be God. But, I say, everything that's great isn't God. I'm at that crossroad. I'm at a place where I have to be sure that I know, that I know, that God is directing my path and not just me doing what's great for me. And at this crossroad I've come to realize that no matter what I do, good- bad- or indifferent, He is always their.  God is ALWAYS with me.  He keeps protecting me from danger. He keeps providing for me.  He keeps comforting me. And He keeps listening to me when I need to talk to Him. He has been a present and constant help. 

Psalms 46:1 says "God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble".  Lamentations 3:22-24 tells us "It is of the Lord's mercies that we are not consumed, because his compassion's fail not. They are new every morning: great is thy faithfulness. The Lord is my portion, saith my soul; therefore will I hope in him." The Message Bible says it like this, 

"God’s loyal love couldn’t have run out,

    his merciful love couldn’t have dried up.

They’re created new every morning.

    How great your faithfulness!

I’m sticking with God (I say it over and over).

    He’s all I’ve got left.

I love that! That is so powerful, "God's loyal love COULDN'T have run out!" Every single day we get a fresh batch of love, loyalty and mercy! He is a faithful God!  At the end of the day, while I'm in this place of being assured that I am hearing God I know that He is my strength, He is with me, He is so faithful and I can put my HOPE IN HIM. 

Not many may understand your path and your destiny.  Most will question you because it doesn't make 'sense' to them. But if in your heart and spirit you are at peace according to His word, then stay on that path. Stay in prayer. Stay focused. And stay in God!

What do you say...?

Death does something really strange to me. I know that we all grieve and mourn differently. When those moments have occurred in my life, I choose solitude over the comfort of being around others. I'd rather not discuss what has happened, but reflect inwardly on their life and our times together. It works best for me. However, when the death occurs in the family of someone you love dearly, I have no idea what to do. Do you call, visit, send flowers or what? My friends father passed and I must admit, I hurt for her more than I've hurt for anyone in awhile.  She no longer has either one of her parents with her. How must that feel? I'm blessed that both of my parents are still with me today. I can call, visit and even send them flowers. I've been told that the loss of a parent is something that only those who've experienced it can explain. Or rather not explain. 

Because I'm at a loss for words, I found this quote from a site that has zillions of poems for all occasions. I pray for peace and comfort for anyone who has lost a parent. No matter the reason or cause; their is now a void where their was once life and that alone is reason for God's intervention.

"A death in the family leaves a void that cannot be filled. No one can ever take the place of this individual in the world. We should not try to comfort the family by saying that "it was his time anyway", or, "he was suffering". These may be words of comfort later. However, there must be time to mourn the fact that things will never be the same. One minute he was here and now he is gone. The human mind must be allowed to sit with this reality. Mourning is a necessary part of the human experience. If it is ignored, a general feeling of sadness may pervade the whole family."

Source: Poems about Death and Family www.FamilyFriendPoems.com 

COMFORT
2 Cor. 1:3-5

Surrounded by friends
yet all alone
the one I loved
God has called home

the hugs of friends
helps ease the pain
and I know my loss
is my loved one's gain

but tears now flow
across my face
as I long for just
one more embrace

then comfort comes
and I see Christ's face
He hugs my loved one
and I feel God's grace.

P.O.S.H'ture Ministry: Something about that name Jesus!

The last few weeks have been... well, interesting. School is creeping along. At times I feel as if I'm not going to make it.  It's not that it's hard, it's just that my mind and focus are on so many other things. But I keep pressing on, because I know that'll I'll be closer to the finish line than when I started.
Personally I've been in a place of "meditation" for lack of a better word. It's strange how even in your 40's you are still figuring out this thing called life. When does it end? I guess, never. Everyday I learn more and more about myself that I thought I already knew.
The one thing that has remained constant in my life is the fact that I know I can call on the name of Jesus. If moma didn't teach me anything else, she taught me that theirs no name above the name of Jesus. He is ALWAYS there, He never leaves us. No matter how old I get I know that if I can just get out a whisper of His name He hears me. There's soooo much power in just His name alone! Even when I can't mumble out a prayer, just the sound of His name brings me peace.
That one constant has kept my mind at peace throughout this portion of my journey. I hesitate in thinking of a new shift that I see up the road and that is approaching quickly.  I'm excited, nervous, apprehensive and all the emotions you can imagine all rolled up in one.  But I know that no matter what, God is with me and He is at the wheel.
When you're in that spot of not knowing what to do or where to go, remember to just whisper His name. When you're drowning your pillow in tears, and your eyes are swollen from crying, whisper His name. Sometimes decisions need to be made quickly and with the confusion going on you can't possibly consider the choices before you; we can whisper His name and watch how He works it out! JESUS!!!!!!!!

Watch Shirley Caesar's video above as she sings "Jesus, I love Calling your name!"
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